Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Twenty-nine

Seven more months and I’ll be 30. What’s the big deal with it? Nothing. I just feel writing about it. Perhaps, I am just amazed at how some young individuals reaping awards and recognitions in their field of expertise. All I can do is applause. I don’t envy them, its just that going through my years of existence I can’t think of any achievement worth of a standing ovation. Yes, I always lack self-confidence and I have been battling with it for the longest time. One of the reasons is my partial disability. The very moment I found out that I was half-blind, every thing just changes. There are endless of lists that I have to avoid so as not to injure my remaining (right) eye. It wasn’t easy; I experienced rejections because of the mentioned defect. Some confronted me in a gentle manner but others are too harsh to shove it to my face.

I remember one plant manager praising my work experiences during the interview, how she thought that I may be over-qualified for the position. And when I told her about my eye – she said this without blinking “madami pang trabaho para sa ‘yo”. An abrupt 360-degree turn of events. LOL. I can laugh it now though. One time when I was chosen to be dispatched to Oman, I underwent a medical examination that required an eye check, of course. This eye specialist, after checking my eyes, went out of the room and announced in full volume that the guy inside the cubicle is blind. Yeah, I’m blind – so what! You don’t need to tell everyone about it. I won’t be getting a handshake of pity because of that, Doc!

twenty-nine


I felt discriminated. I hope some of the companies here would see one’s capability beyond his disability.

Fortunately though, some overseas companies do not mind my situation. They don’t care about it as long I can perform the specified responsibilities. They seem to be more levelheaded than most local companies. You can’t blame me if I prefer working outside Philippines.

From time to time, self-pity and insecurities let their presence felt but I am trying to brush them off. I hope I can be a confident one – a confident one-eyed engineer.

/totomai
05/16/07

9 comments:

  1. 29And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. (Matthew 5:29)

    You are more righteous than most of the 2-eyed men around here. And righteousness is what matters to God. :) God loves you.

    And yeah, some people are too immature and unrighteous to discriminate men with disabilities. Because everyone has.

    Cheers! :)

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  2. Wow! Emo article with a recycled picture. :p Thanks for blogging a lot these past few days, Engr. Marami tuloy akong nababasa.

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  3. by the way, i'll be leaving for thailand this friday lol

    @geo thanks. hehe. i feel sad though about the occurence of discrimination in local companies

    @benj lol. i havent used this photo yet here. i posted this photo in one of your threads at PEX. actually im planning to re-post 2 of my previous articles here at blogspot. haha. thanks

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  4. People, who don't want you, are the losers!

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  5. You should work on that self esteem thing. You have plenty to brag about. BJ

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  6. Too many restrictions in the workplace mean many capable people are treated unfairly because of relatively minor conditions.

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  7. You have the right to be proud. Charge on man - fly by the fools... ;)

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  8. Konnichi wa.

    Blind? Nonsense!

    Your vision transcends the mundane. How else can you explain your ability to reveal a whole new world through your camera lens? You see what we miss, such as the suspended wine glasses basking in amber light. The child behind the chains in "Hopeless" told a story on its own.

    Powerful work, Totomai. Subarashii ~ magnificent!

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  9. You have a beautiful blog here!
    Growing OLD is mandatory but growing UP is not!!!!

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any thoughts to distill?

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